From a female friend.

With time, women gain weight because we accumulate so much information and
wisdom in our heads that when there
is no more room, it distributes out
to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren't heavy, we are enormously
cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today, when I look at my butt
in the mirror I will think, 

“Good grief, look how smart I am!”

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10/18/10